I am a very tolerant person. I respect all races, all religions. Indeed I celebrate multi-culturalism. So I am rather disturbed by my own discomfort over the increasing number of foreigners in our midst. Why am I uncomfortable? Why am I irritated when I confront language difficulties with service staff? Why am I irritated by people speaking loudly into their mobiles in public transport in languages I am unfamiliar with? They are noisy. Try riding in a bus during the weekend! WHY INDEED have I become intolerant when I have grown up in a Singapore of many races.

This article is my way of finding the reason for my unease and the concern of other Singaporeans in this whole question of foreigners. I recall the recommendation we made in AWARE’s first population paper as a response to the government’s call for women to have more children: that one way to make up for the falling birth rate was to invite more immigrants. That was almost 23 years ago when our population was about 2.74 million. Now it is 5 million. Did we ever dream that there would be so many people in our small island.

I feel claustrophobic. I am being pushed around by a crowd of strangers I cannot identify with. That sense of claustrophobia is not only physical but also psychological. This feeling of being pushed around – the psychological – was an ever-present reality of our lives in Singapore with so many rules and laws and out-of-boundary markers that is part of our political culture. This is exacerbated by the ever-changing physical landscape. Some years ago I remember getting lost in the Paya Lebar/Serangoon area, the familiar haunts of my growing-up years. If you have been out of Singapore for any length of time it is easy to get lost. So many familiar landmarks are gone. The lifestyle survey by the Urban Redevelopment Authority , early this year, revealed that 73.2 per cent felt that the physical landscape in Singapore changes too quickly. Most felt that familiar places should be kept as they contribute strongly to their sense of belonging.

To forge a strong sense of identity citizens must be made to feel that their views and concerns are taken into account, that the process by which decisions are made on their behalf are transparent. Next they must have a stable sense of place. Remember too that almost 90 per cent of our population was rehoused in HDB flats in the last 30 years. When these requirements for a sense of self and place are shaky, citizens begin to feel alienated. In addition housing and the cost of housing are escalating beyond the reach of many young Singaporeans. Kiasusim is one of our defining characteristics and we are losing out in our own country. We are a nation of grumblers as a result.

So really the “Singapore Spirit” that the Prime Minister referred to in his National Day Rally speech is shaky at best. The surge in the numbers of foreigners is just the last straw. We couldn’t protest (we were too scared) about our political culture. We didn’t have much say in the way housing policies were implemented. Nobody listened to us when we protested against the demolition of iconic buildings such as the National Library building in Stamford Road. We have put up with so much.

–But foreigners and so many of them! The foreigners are wealthier. They are being feted and celebrated as foreign talents. Hey this is getting too much even for subservient Singaporeans.

My claustrophobia is psychic. I am in a diaspora in my own country.